Thinking over a few of my favorite shows, I think I've started to notice a growing trend in serialized T.V.: it's forgotten how to tell stories. Now sure, the networks, and some cable stations are still full of hour-long reset programs, like NCIS, or any one of the hundred incarnations of Law and Order, and by all measures, they rank among the most popular, but I'm talking about the "Losts", or "True Bloods" that gain a bit more of the cult following status.
In its earlier seasons, every episode of "Lost" told a whole story, one with a recognizable beginning, middle and end. But as the seasons rolled on, the individual episodes stopped providing these single-serving stories, and became more and more a random collection of scenes leading to the next cliff-hanger. Now don't get me wrong, I love me some long, season arch-y goodness, but when each episode starts to serve the whole at the sake of itself, the experience of sitting down for that weeks adventure becomes less and less memorable. Heroes fell into this trap even earlier than lost. And with a 22 episode season to fill, by the time you got to the end, it felt like the season had lost its direction.
And here is where I'm going to break form, and not just talk about what I mean, but lay down an example from my own library of what I'm taking about. Over the next couple of weeks, I'm going to roll out three of my favorite episodes from two web-series I've written (and hope to someday produce!!) Not just a scene, but three full, beginning to end, finished scripts. I'm going to start with the pilots from each, then include my two favorite episodes. So without further adieu, I present you with the pilot for "Generation Z".
________________________________________
Generation “Z”
Here we are...
TEASER
INT. BOMB SHELTER (USE GARADGE) - NIGHT
The POTUS is standing before a large black curtain, hands
firmly clutching the sides of the podium. The POTUS waits
for a signal that the cameras are live.
A crew-member signals that they’re on in five, four, three...
The POTUS looks over his speech one last time with the
knowledge that this will be the last time that he, or any
other President will ever address the nation...
POTUS
My fellow citizens of The United
States, and my fellow citizens of
the world, I imagine this will be
the last time that I will ever make
a formal address... so I come to
you, not as President or Commander
in Chief, but as an ordinary man...
(getting chocked-up)
a man who is frightened of an
uncertain future... as I’m sure
many of you are. And, like all
other men, I am flawed... and I
have made many mistakes...
(beat)
But, I think today, regardless of
your faith or lack there of, it’s
clear that we are at the end of
days...
FADE TO BLACK.
END OF TEASER
ACT ONE
EXT. VAN - NIGHT
We push in on a van with bright light spilling from its
windows. We can hear the muffled sound of chatter coming
from a small television-like speakers.
INT. VAN - CONTINUOUS
Inside the van, we see Ardi (short for Bernard) and Si (short
for Simon - he’s obese) watching a webisode of “Waiting for
the Code” on a mini-portable DVD player, plugged into a
cigarette-lighter.
ARDI
Ah, the holy miracle that was
illegal downloading.
(beat)
I remember the internet like it was
yesterday.
SI
Dude, it practically was. Our
zombie overlords haven’t been in
charge for that long.
(beat)
Shh, shh, this is my favorite part.
Both of them turn their attentions to the screen, and are
quiet for a moment as they watch.
ARDI
It’s kinda beautiful; it’s like,
even after the apocalypse, they’re
still waiting for their friend.
ANGLE ON: WALKIE-TALKIE
A burst of static erupts from it, and the faint sound of a
woman’s voice.
ANGLE ON: ARDI AND SI
Ardi and Si pay no attention and continue watching...
EXT. ALLY - CONTINUOUS
We see a young woman, Brigit, ease into frame. A loud growl
echoes from the distance.
In one fluid motion, she raises the walkie to her face.
BRIGIT
Guys, I’ve got action, copy.
No answer.
BRIGIT (CONT’D)
Uh, guys, you there?
INT. VAN - CONTINUOUS
We see Ardi and Si laughing at “Waiting for the Code”.
EXT. ALLY - CONTINUOUS
Brigit lowers her walkie, defeated.
BRIGIT
(shakes head)
Fucking Ardi.
Brigit jumps when she hears a clatter in the not-far-off
distance.
We see a male zombie, dressed in Mormon-misisonary attire.
He eyes Brigit, and lets out an inhumane howl, then shuffles
toward her.
Brigit turns and eyes the zombie.
BRIGIT (CONT’D)
There you are.
(holdsters walkie)
Come to mamma.
Brigit gives a look as if to say “did I really just say
that?”
The zombie clumsily holds up a tattered “Book of Mormon”. We
can see that his fingers have clutched onto it so tightly his
nails have clawed deep into the cover.
BRIGIT (CONT’D)
(mockingly)
Oh look mr. Missionary man, I’m a
poor defenseless woman who’s
wandered herself out of the
kitchen, what ever shall I do?
The zombie continues to slowly shuffle to Brigit. A little board,
Brigit takes a step closer, positioning herself in front of a
pitch-black corner.
Brigit rolls her eyes, and pulls a gun from her waistband,
and aims.
3.
BRIGIT (CONT’D)
Eat this mother-
Another zombie jumps from the darkness and grabs Brigit, and
pulls her into the dark. She fires randomly to no avail.
DISSOLVE TO
WHITE:
INT. HALLWAY - EVENING
POV: MARIA
Maria (Brigit’s younger sister) is stalking down the hall
toward Brigit’s door.
M.S. HALLWAY
Maria listens for a moment, and can hear Brigit softly crying
from her room. Maria takes a deep breath, then knocks.
MARIA
Brigit.
No answer. Maria knocks again.
MARIA (CONT’D)
Sisko, can I come in?
BRIGIT (O.S.)
Go away!
Maria shakes her head, then opens the door and marches in.
INT. BRIGIT’S BEDROOM - CONTINUOUS
Maria closes the door behind her. Hesitantly, she takes a
few steps to her bed.
MARIA
(weak smile)
Treve sisko.
Brigit is sitting on her bed, wiping away her tears.
BRIGIT
God, why did I think I could do
this?
MARIA
(as she sits)
Because you’re like a bad-ass?
(beat).
And I swear I’m not just saying
that because I’m your sisko.
BRIGIT
(forced smile)
Kitos.
Brigit runs her hand trough her hair, then looks at it.
BRIGIT (CONT’D)
(crying harder)
What if they cut off all my hair?
(sob, sob)
I can’t do this!
MARIA
So what? Then you’ll be just like
Demi Moore in G.I. Jane, and wasn’t
she like uber hot in that movie?
BRIGIT
(lightens up)
Okay, only like totally.
(long pause)
They’re saying that I could ship to
Afganistan right after basic.
(looks down)
My recruiter said I’ll only get
like a week to... say good-by and
stuff.
Maria hugs Brigit.
MARIA
I love you sisko.
(beat)
Just don’t forget why you’re doing
this.
Brigit nods as:
DISSOLVE TO
WHITE:
EXT. ALLY - NIGHT
ANGLE ON: BRIGIT’S GUN
It skids away.
ANGLE ON: BRIGIT AND ZOMBIE
Brigit fights the zombie off of her, then moves away to give
her some distance. After she feels she has enough space, she
looks around for something she can use.
She eyes a short 2X4, and grabs it.
BRIGIT
I guess we’re kicken’ it old
school.
The zombie starts to slowly move toward her, then stops. He
looks down to his legs, then back to Brigit. After a beat,
he full-on runs at her.
Brigit is shocked and terrified for a moment.
BRIGIT (CONT’D)
Shit.
Brigit takes off running. She un-holdsters her walkie, and
screams into it:
BRIGIT (CONT’D)
Hey, meal-on-wheleels, DO YOU
COPY!!!
INT. VAN - CONTINUOUS
Ardi picks up the walkie. We pull back to reveal he is in a
wheelchair.
ARDI
Dose she have to be so mean?
(into walkie)
I think someone forgot the magic
word...
INTERCUT: ARDI AND BRIGIT
Brigit has lost the zombie, for now...
BRIGIT
(out of breath)
They’re getting faster.
ARDI
Faster... would you say they’ve
gone from a shuffle to a saunter,
or is it more of a jaunt?
Brigit sees the zombie in the not-too-far-off distance.
BRIGIT
(urgent)
They’re running!
STOP INTERCUTTING: WIDE ANGLE INSIDE VAN
Ardi is suddenly panicked.
ARDI
Be right there.
Ardi tosses down the walkie.
BRIGIT (O.S.)
I lost my gun... hurry
ARDI
(to Si)
Help me down. I’ve gotta get to
her.
SI
Wait, dude, I should totally be the
one who goes after her.
ARDI
What? Okay, one: you’re fat. And
two, someone has to drive the van
over, and...
Ardi gives Si a “well duh” look.
SI
Whoa, dude, not cool baggin’ on me
for my weight. First, yes, I’m
fat, but check it, I survived the
zombie apocalypse. Not an easy
task. And I’m wicked strong bro;
like I can lift things that are...
really heavy, and I can hit stuff
pretty hard. And I know how to aim
a gun!
(beat)
But you’re totally right about the
van thing.
EXT. VAN - CONTINUOUS
Si jumps out, and runs to the back. He opens the door, and
attaches the ramp.
SI
(helping Ardi down)
Good luck dude.
Just find a really steep hill,
they’ll never catch you.
ARDI
Just... Hurry.
Si runs to the van, and starts it. Ardi rolls off.
EXT. ALLY - MOMENTS LATER
The zombie has Brigit cornered. She clutches her 2X4. The
zombie falls backward as Ardi crashes into him. Ardi
struggles to hold his mouth shut.
Brigit knocks out the zombie from behind.
Ardi smiles shyly at Brigit - he has a crush on her.
ARDI
(nervously)
Nice hittin’ stick.
BRIGIT
(with a smile)
Lost my gun. Had to improvise.
ARDI
“Who’s Line is it Anyway” for the
post-apocalypse, ladies and
gentlemen.
Brigit gets serious again.
BRIGIT
We’ve got one more.
Brigit walks forward, then turns to Ardi.
BRIGIT (CONT’D)
Missionary type bastard.
The zombie appears behind Brigit.
ARDI
Uh, white shirt, tie, bible...
Behind you!!!
Brigit swings around hitting the zombie in the chest. He
falls to the ground.
Brigit stalks over him.
BRIGIT
Gee, not so tough now.
(raises 2X4)
This is for always interrupting
dinner!
Brigit beats the zombies body.
The van pulls into the ally. Brigit doesn’t stop.
ARDI
Uh, Brigit.
Brigit stops for a moment.
BRIGIT
(panting)
And this is for prop 8!
Brigit smashes his head with the 2X4, then drops it.
BRIGIT (CONT’D)
(to Ardi)
Lets go. We should be able to
gather some supplies from this area
now.
Brigit rolls Ardi to the van as we:
DISSOLVE TO:
EXT. VAN - LATER
The van is driving down a deserted road.
SI
So when do you think the human race
is going to... you know, make a
comeback?
BRIGIT
(from back of the van)
Never.
SI
So we’re totally like the dinosaurs
in “Jurassic Park”.
(to himself)
Cool.
Ardi wheels closer to Brigit.
ARDI
(fake smile)
You weren’t killing a zombie back
there, were you?
BRIGIT
Decaying flesh, vacancy sign,
hunger for brains; I’d say he
qualifies as the postmortem.
ARDI
No, I mean your aggression. You
weren’t killing zombie-him, you
were killing him-him, or the him
you thought he was, any way.
BRIGIT
Say what?
ARDI
You can’t tell me that there isn’t
a tincy-wincy little part of you
that’s using this zombie buffet as
an excuse to go to town on the
people you didn’t like... before.
And if that’s the case, what makes
us different than them?
Brigit shakes her head, then stands to move to the front of
the van.
BRIGIT
(sarcastic, bitter)
Just what I needed to hear right
now.
Brigit climbs into the passenger seat.
ARDI
I didn't mean... fuck.
ANGLE ON: BRIGIT
End of episode one
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